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It's so confusing. It seems like it should be SO clear, but it's not. Not to the person it happened to...I'm so sorry it happened to you, and I'm so grateful to you for telling your story here.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I think so many of us have blamed ourselves when someone used our youth and inexperience against us.
thank you for sharing your story in this conversation... the details and question/answer are so important and Im sure will enlighten more than a few women who "wonder" like you did. Who question their intuition and their responses and wonder if they were more assertive, or louder, or something... No. Rape is rape is rape. You said no and he kept right on going. Im sorry this was your first experience. Im glad you know now what it really was, and Im sorry that he hurt you with his actions, his body, and his words. You are brave and beautiful and Im so glad you wrote on VU!
"...a therapist is a human and gets pissed.”
Crying, seriously. I'm so very sorry, love, but thank you for sharing this with us.
Wow. I'm so very sorry for what was done to you. How vicious. Thank you so much for sharing it. That's such a brave thing to do. And I agree, of course, it absolutely, positively was rape. No doubt.
Your therapist is awesome. I have love and respect for you and I am sorry you had to go through this and think about this for so long. Thank you for sharing. Keep talking about it. Take strength from all of our voices and keep healing.
I'm so horrified that you had to go through this as a young girl. As a mother to kids that age, I'm so so sad. Thank you for sharing your story with us and using your voice to shine a light on the violence you endured.
Redneck Mommy I'm sad too. And it's because of my kids that I'm talking about it. To learn and to make sure I teach about respect and honor and love.
Oh Elizabeth! I'm sorry that you feel this is your fault. Your therapist is right - he was an asshole. This was totally his doing, not yours. You told him no, he did not listen, it's all on him. I'm glad you are gradually finding healing and learning to be kind to yourself. *hugs* for the journey.
tigger62077 Thank you. The brain is weird, isn't it? The disconnect between logic and emotion can sometimes be so huge.
Elizabeth The Author It really is, and it take time...a lot of time, sometimes....to close that gap. You logically know something and feel another - even on the small things. Something this big? Yeah, it's a big gap. I have faith that someday, with the help of your human therapist, you will make that gap smaller.
Elizabeth, I'm so sorry this happened to you, and that you have struggled with believing that it's not your fault. (It's absolutely not, by the way.)
My hope is that you are finding some healing in therapy, and that your future holds nothing but peace and happiness. Thank you so much for sharing your story here.