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Thank you for visiting Violence UnSilenced, a speak-out platform for survivors of domestic abuse, sexual assault, and sexual abuse. If you are a survivor and it is safe to do so, we encourage you to share your story here. If you are not a survivor but you want to support those who are, please click around this site and find out more about what you can do.
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so sorry you weren't validated as a child, and your pain and trauma was dismissed. What happened was a big deal, and it should have never happened.
Jan, thank you for speaking out! I have also had trouble realizing that I am worth protecting and downplaying my addictions and abuse. I am so happy that God has blessed you with recovery!!!
Jan your abuse was BAD! There is no scale of not bad, bad, horrible. ALL abuse is horrible!
I am so sorry that disgusting human harmed you and that your parents did not comfort or protect you!
I have two small children and I think I could see myself getting arrested for bodily injury to ANYONE that dare lay a hand on them. I am so sorry you did not have that protection and level of comfort from your family. I completely understand how that incident, and the message your parents sent you, can lead to feelings of unworthiness. But know that you are, you always have been, it's your parents who aren't worthy of you. Keep working on your positive outlook. You've spoken and it can only get better from here.
Speaking out means the world to so many others who need to understand that abuse like that IS a big deal, it stays with people 48 years and longer, and deserves to be be heard, comforted and addressed. I'm sorry that didn't happened then, and that you went unheard and uncomforted, and that he was allowed to continue his abuse of others. But I'm so, so glad you are speaking now, here. It helps so many to read your words. I hope it's a comfort to you to be heard here as well.
Jan, I want to assure you that you *were* and *are* worthy. Thank you for speaking out and breaking free from the silence.
I often wonder about the choice an adult makes to correct/problem solve/otherwise deflect an experience like this for a child, rather than comfort, when that could make such a crucial difference for a little girl.
I can relate so much (although for very different reasons) to the mistaken notion that you're not worth protection. I hope you continue to find the many reasons why that's the opposite of true, and I'm glad you found a space here to share your story. Thank you.
Thank you SO MUCH for telling this. People must understand that there is no such thing as "not too bad" when it comes to sexual abuse. I'm so sorry you weren't protected and comforted, as you should have been. You're brave and amazing for telling this here! I admire you so much for that. You're fully deserving of everything you need and want as you work to heal this. Thanks for sharing this.
Oh Jan...I'm so angry for the child that was told this wasn't "bad" and the hurt you went through trying to swallow pain you were never allowed to understand. DAMN parents like yours for not being more protective and angry and taking care of the girl that was hurt that day.
Thank you for sharing your pain with us. I hope we can be part of your healing.
You have always been worth protecting. Something similar happened to a few of the women in my mom's generation by their uncle and they were quickly silenced too. I am so sorry that this awful man existed in your world.