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I learned how to function like a normal person again. I forced myself to make eye contact with people and look straight ahead when I walk instead of down at the floor. BUY LUNESTA OVER THE COUNTER, I learned how to embrace physical touch instead of flinching. I re-programmed my brain so that I could pick up the phone and call my mother without being afraid of the consequences. I've learned how to make friends after being isolated from everyone who didn't live in my apartment. I've learned that I AM SMART and I AM NOT WORTHLESS. I've learned that I am important to people in both my personal and professional lives.
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Kristie blogs at Ponderous Rambling.
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Thank you for visiting Violence UnSilenced, a speak-out platform for survivors of domestic abuse, sexual assault, and sexual abuse. If you are a survivor and it is safe to do so, we encourage you to share your story here. If you are not a survivor but you want to support those who are, please click around this site and find out more about what you can do.
I know what it's like to have to look for confirmation that I am not the crazy one, that I'm not the one who's gone entirely off the deep end. You said it so well. Thanks for sharing.
It's so hard to talk about the abuse that doesn't leave physical bruises or scars - because as you're dealing with it, you somehow convince yourself that it's "not that bad". But it is - and you survived, and turned your life around. Your strength is inspiring...
Thank you for sharing your story. I admire that you refused to let the lies you were told seep into your soul and that you have done so much to help others.
Thank you for sharing. Its never an easy thing to do and you did it wonderfully. Bravo on getting help and getting out :)
goodness getting done on twitter RT @ MaggieDammitThanks for supporting today's brave survivor http://violenceunsilenced.com/kristie/
RT @MaggieDammit: Thanks for supporting today's brave survivor http://violenceunsilenced.com/kristie/
RT @MaggieDammit: Thanks for supporting today's brave survivor http://violenceunsilenced.com/kristie/
Thank you for sharing your story. I am sure that your experiences help and inspire those that you seek to help/
I've been there, Kristie and I'm sorry. I'm so glad that we both got out before it was too late. Thank you for sharing. I'm honored to know you.
Wow! I totally could have written this post, nearly word for word.
Your strength gives me strength. Thank you!
And thank you for sharing and for being a light to others who need help.
How wonderful that you turned it around and gained strength enough to help others help themselves. That is awesome.
I am so inspired by your courage and determination! Thank you for digging deep within yourself to tap your inner strength and take a stand for yourself, your children, your dignity and for all victims of abuse and violence. You are a true hero! By sharing your story the seeds of courage and strength are spread to the winds! You never know where they will land and germinate! Thank you!
Good for you. That reprogramming isn't easy or always successful. I'm glad things worked out for you.
Thank you for sharing your story, Kristie. I am impressed with your strength and fearlessness now, in the face of your history as you volunteer at the domestic abuse line, and I hope that your future is bright and successful. Thank you!
May God bless and keep you always, Kristie. Thank you for sharing your story this morning. It's inspiring to see someone claim victory, emerging from oppression and fear. Keep doing what you're doing. Your post about the encounter at the swimming pool provides a wonderful example of how you (and each of us) can change the world.
I'm praying for victims everywhere still living in the nightmare.
Thank you SO much for sharing your very inspirational story. Congratulations on realizing that you are strong, and -staying- strong.
You're an amazing and brave woman. Thank you for sharing your story, and more importantly, thank you for helping others.
God bless you.
Thank you for hitting him back.
Thank you for not giving up and going back - as scary as it must have been.
Thank you for listening to the arresting officer.
Thank you for making your kids safe that way.
Thank you for volunteering your self, volunteering to have it dredged back up and remembered and re-freshened in order to help others.
Thank you for saying it here, particularly because someone could stumble across it and be spurred to action.
And I'm sorry. I am genuinely sorry that something so incredibly wrong happened to you. Sorry has nothing to do with fixing it, but I'm lifting up my sorrow for you to see, to acknowledge the wrongness of it with you.
AMEN, AMEN, AMEN! Your story is great on so many levels that I hardly know where to start.
First, BIG hugs to you for sharing it, and second, for using your experience as a way to help others as a volunteer.
Third, congratulations for finding the strength and the courage to realize what a great person you are. NEVER let anyone ever tell you otherwise. Fourth, what a marvelous example you've set for your children. And finally, kudos to you for setting countless others straight on the many forms that abuse can take.
If you haven't already, it sounds like you are well on your way to finding the peace and happiness you so richly deserve.
You learned another lesson that you didn't include in your list. Abusers are, at their core, nothing more than bullies and cowards. Sure, there's a small percentage with genuine psychoses, but the typical abuser is only removed from the schoolyard bully who picks on the smaller weaker kids by the passage of years. And they respond the same way when the smaller weaker kid stops taking it.
You took back the power, took back your life, and I for one could not be prouder or happier to see it. But best of all, you haven't stopped there. Your work is empowering others, and your story here is an extension of that.
Thank you. For the ones you've helped find the way out of the dark, and the ones you will, thank you. Your story -- and you -- are a gift.