Comments on: Pamela http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/ Violence UnSilenced: Shedding light on domestic violence and sexual abuse/assault by giving survivors a voice. Thu, 09 Sep 2010 00:01:21 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Aubrey http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-3994 Aubrey Tue, 02 Jun 2009 01:30:32 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-3994 thank you. :) thank you. :)

]]> By: Eaton Bennett http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-3239 Eaton Bennett Tue, 19 May 2009 02:55:46 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-3239 No matter how long it took you to get out, you did get out! And it is especially wonderful that you have a relationship that is all it should be. No matter how long it took you to get out, you did get out! And it is especially wonderful that you have a relationship that is all it should be.

]]> By: maria http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-3196 maria Mon, 18 May 2009 01:55:13 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-3196 i feel your pain. i know your pain. and i know how liberating it can be to write those words when you have no-way out. it was 4am the first time it happened to me. i remember the smell of bourbon and pizza. it was snowing. it was my husband. it was snowing outside and i felt cold and stared at the cable box as i counted down the minutes until he was done. it took me years until i let myself trust and i still don't fully. it is not right. it is not fair, the rage i feel for letting it happen, for letting myself lay there like a rag doll is something i will never forgive myself for, but the strength it gave me and it gave you is something NO-ONE can take away. live strong, live proud. no-one can touch you anymore. i feel your pain. i know your pain. and i know how liberating it can be to write those words when you have no-way out. it was 4am the first time it happened to me. i remember the smell of bourbon and pizza. it was snowing. it was my husband. it was snowing outside and i felt cold and stared at the cable box as i counted down the minutes until he was done.

it took me years until i let myself trust and i still don’t fully. it is not right. it is not fair, the rage i feel for letting it happen, for letting myself lay there like a rag doll is something i will never forgive myself for, but the strength it gave me and it gave you is something NO-ONE can take away.

live strong, live proud. no-one can touch you anymore.

]]> By: amanda guthrie http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-3041 amanda guthrie Fri, 15 May 2009 00:04:39 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-3041 First off tysdaddy is right no mean no! Any demeaning belittling behavior is wrong even if there are no bruises, no physical marks the damage that is done from this kind of behavior is ever lasting. Pamela, not just the rapes but the controlling, the questioning its all part of the trauma you've suffered. Know one should minimize your experience, it's yours you have to live with it not them. If they pass any kind of judgment they aren't worth your time (sorry to sound like mom).When you need support come here we will not categorize you only listen. First off tysdaddy is right no mean no! Any demeaning belittling behavior is wrong even if there are no bruises, no physical marks the damage that is done from this kind of behavior is ever lasting.
Pamela, not just the rapes but the controlling, the questioning its all part of the trauma you’ve suffered. Know one should minimize your experience, it’s yours you have to live with it not them. If they pass any kind of judgment they aren’t worth your time (sorry to sound like mom).When you need support come here we will not categorize you only listen.

]]> By: Erika http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-2932 Erika Wed, 13 May 2009 13:14:39 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-2932 You are right -- abuse is abuse. And "life or death" doesn't always have to mean physical life or death. Trauma occurs any time our ability to cope -- physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual -- are overwhelmed and debilitated. Thank you so much for sharing your very important story. You are a survivor and we celebrate you. You are right — abuse is abuse. And “life or death” doesn’t always have to mean physical life or death. Trauma occurs any time our ability to cope — physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual — are overwhelmed and debilitated. Thank you so much for sharing your very important story. You are a survivor and we celebrate you.

]]> By: tysdaddy http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-2896 tysdaddy Tue, 12 May 2009 21:47:30 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-2896 Pamela always makes me laugh. Today, she made me cry. No means no, guys. Every time! I too am glad you are now safe and loved . . . Pamela always makes me laugh. Today, she made me cry.

No means no, guys. Every time!

I too am glad you are now safe and loved . . .

]]> By: Screwed Up Texan http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-2895 Screwed Up Texan Tue, 12 May 2009 21:38:30 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-2895 Thank you for sharing. Sometimes we never know what lies beneath the surface. For someone who seemed so polite, unassuming, shy, working at a not-for-profit--this is probably the kind of person I would have persued. Thank you for sharing. Sometimes we never know what lies beneath the surface. For someone who seemed so polite, unassuming, shy, working at a not-for-profit–this is probably the kind of person I would have persued.

]]> By: Tricia http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-2889 Tricia Tue, 12 May 2009 19:46:00 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-2889 Thank you for this, and for helping more people to see that unwanted sex with a partner is still rape! Thank you for this, and for helping more people to see that unwanted sex with a partner is still rape!

]]> By: Indigo http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-2836 Indigo Mon, 11 May 2009 18:53:31 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-2836 Thank you for sending this in. No matter how violent the abuse, it's a game of control that the abuser weilds as a weapon - some more violent than others. No one has a right to exercise that kind of control over a person. The emotional scars this behavior leaves are far more ugly sometimes than the physical ones. It took a lot of courage to send this story in. (Hugs)Indigo Thank you for sending this in. No matter how violent the abuse, it’s a game of control that the abuser weilds as a weapon – some more violent than others.
No one has a right to exercise that kind of control over a person. The emotional scars this behavior leaves are far more ugly sometimes than the physical ones.

It took a lot of courage to send this story in. (Hugs)Indigo

]]> By: carma http://violenceunsilenced.com/pamela/#comment-2795 carma Mon, 11 May 2009 02:16:19 +0000 http://violenceunsilenced.com/?p=413#comment-2795 you are very brave and I'm glad you've married a man who treats you as you deserve to be treated.. you are very brave and I’m glad you’ve married a man who treats you as you deserve to be treated..

]]>