Comments on: Sara

By: Helena

Helena — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 02:51:25 +0000

I recognize myself in what you say.

By: neers

neers — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 08:39:19 +0000

sara, you gotta take that risk once more and be open with your husband… without faith, theres nothing and trust me… if he loves you even iota of how much you say, he does…. he will understand and stand by you…. if not then you would know better, right!

my love and prayers with you!

By: Fran

Fran — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 19:44:50 +0000

Sara, There are quite a few outstanding comments above. Everything from “Thank you for sharing” to “You are worthy”. You are worthy. You didn’t deserve the bad things that happened. I think you recognize that you might unwittingly sabotage the relationship you’re in – it sounds like you’re in a good one now. Have you shared this post with your husband? I’d wager that he would appreciate the peek into what’s going on inside of your beautiful soul. Peace, sister. You’re in my prayers. It takes tremendous strength to be a survivor and to emerge as a victor. Bless you for sharing your story.

By: Alane

Alane — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 07:38:02 +0000

I learned about this site months ago. I clicked, and then ran away. I’ve done that a few times now. Skipping over this site the same way I skip over the memories and the situation I find myself in now.

I am on my number 2 abusive relationship. The first was physical, the current it emotional warfare. It hasn’t once been physical. But it has been deeply emotional in the most insidious way. A game that is constantly denied as a game. He is a shadow, a ninja sniper.

And I am in that place Sara, that place of feeling like I am the common denominator. That I must be so inherently flawed as to not be lovable. That this is somehow all my fault. I can see it so clearly, when I read your words, or the words of others, how it isn’t any of your fault, but I can’t get there for myself.

I will lay awake tonight, trying to find the courage I need to see this as clearly for myself. There is fear in leaving, but there is also fear that it really is me, and that no one anywhere will ever find me pretty enough, smart enough, or generally worthy of love and respect.

I can understand why your mind cannot accept the love it is being given. Keep trying.

By: amber

amber — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 02:07:38 +0000

I feel your pain…but you won’t break. You are strong. And although he might not understand, I pray he will comfort you and give you the space you need to heal.

By: Jean

Jean — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 00:43:20 +0000

Sara, you are not alone. You ARE lovable, worthy and good enough. Always remember that.

By: Amias

Amias — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 09:43:17 +0000

I know how you feel, I had a friend who jumped out of the 9th floor window. She was beautiful and I always wanted to be her.

Saying the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence is a no brainer, still, it’s true.

By: Liz

Liz — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 16:28:39 +0000

You know what, Sara? I’ve been reading this blog about once a week or so for a few months since I found it. The stories here, like yours, are stories of horror and stories of unbelievable strength and bravery, stories of survival. And it could be so easy to read through this site and despair of men, to want to curl up and protect yourself from all of them, indiscriminately. I’ve never experienced what you or the other women on this site have experienced, but I can understand the impulse to self-preservation, and to question yourself and your own worth.

But your story has this other thread that runs through so many of the other ones here. There’s a good man in your life, and you can’t imagine how he could love someone as broken as you perceive yourself to be. So many good men out there who aren’t afraid to help pick up the pieces that other men left scattered and broken. It really is heartening, to me at least. I hope that as you heal, as you begin to trust yourself again, that you can trust in the hope and happiness your husband can bring you. Because you really are worth it, and it was never your fault.

By: Sunny

Sunny — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 03:11:37 +0000

I was in a similar situation… a lot of problems with previous relationships and then finding Mr. Right, whom I kept expecting to turn on me like every one else. But I was totally honest and up front with him about why I snap, why I cry seemingly for no reason, why I get frustrated and lose my temper, why I’m so paranoid jealous about online relationships. I didn’t think he would understand, but he does. He lets me read over his shoulder whenever I want, he has absolutely nothing to hide, and he doesn’t take it personally when I snap at him because of something else. It took a few years to get my trust to the point it is now, and a lot of hard work, but it CAN be done, and I believe you can do it too. There’s a lot of good advice in some of these comments, and I hope you can make the best of it. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

By: Lillian

Lillian — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 22:24:32 +0000

Thank you for having the courage to survive, to keep surviving and for sharing your story.