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I'm coming to this page belatedly, sorry! It sounds like you're off to a good start, and your mother has your back. Finding a counsellor is definitely a good idea -- especially if you find someone experienced in trauma counselling, and one with whom you "click" (if you don't like the first person, don't give up, just shop for a new one!).One thing I'd like to comment on is your fear of unleashing the pain -- perfectly understood, and exactly why it will be good to have a trusted counsellor on board. But the pain IS THERE NOW, even if you've pushed it way under. Bringing it out in the open will hurt -- not gonna lie about that! -- BUT... once it's out in the open, it starts hurting less and less, and stops affecting your current life.Telling your story is such a huge part of the healing process -- you've already begun! You're a very brave woman, and your children will benefit from your strength and example.
Hello everyone, this is Shannon. I have just now read all of your responses, and the compassion you all have shown has brought me to tears, in a good way. Thank you all SO much :) Writing my story was one of the hardest things I've ever done, but it has helped me so much. It's a journey that I expect will never be completely finished, but nothing in life that's worth the time ever is, is it? I'm doing well, the world is a more vibrant place since I started actively dealing with this, and I feel ALIVE for the first time since I was a child. Again, THANK YOU! You all are an amazing group of people, and a blessing when I needed one. Peace and love to all of you.
Thank you for putting that all into words.. your experiences and the effects have similarities to my life - I used to feel in that bubble all the time also. As I have grown and healed it has lessened and even disappeared :) I still have a shocking memory and childhood memories are still sombre, but in everyday life I am happy and well :) Just wanted to let you know there is light at the end of the tunnel! All the best for your journey, and look after yourself - it's the nicest feeling to let yourself be nice to yourself! Lots of love, L
Thank you for putting words to the story you have been holding and sharing it with the rest of us. Speaking out and sharing these events isn't easy but it is such a powerful way to heal and to find the life that you rightfully deserve. I love Maybe - such a hopeful and powerful word. Healing is possible and I wish for you that it does happen. That is what you deserve.
shannon, you deserve to be heard. you deserve to be happy, and at peace with yourself. i wish you continued strength and healing.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Your description of how everything is muted for you is really powerful, and something I could really relate to. It's hard when you start to get a look at what happened and what it really meant. You're amazingly brave and strong for facing this. I'm so, so sorry for everything he did, and for how you weren't protected.
Shannon, I am so sorry for what you went through and the way you have lived, disconnected, for so many years. My hope for you is that you can take the steps to find peace and healing, now and in the future. Thank you so much for having the courage to share your story here.
Shannon, I pray that you find the healing and wholeness you seek. God bless you and thank you for sharing your story.
You have done SO much work on your own. I hear it in your description of how muted you feel, how much more you want. It is hard and it is scary, but it is important. I wish you continued strength, and the best, most compassionate people in your path who can help you untangle the rest. You've got this.
Shannon, I hope you find joy. I hope you get out of the bubble and chase life. You deserve it. I hope you can get past your terrible hurts and find your peace and your happiness.
Of course you deserve to be out of your bubble, to experience the world for real. Do get help. It will hurt at first, but you will be better for it.
Shannon, you DO deserve to live outside the bubble and I hope when you;re ready you know the help you need is there. It isn't easy to face those demons and let those emotions happen when you've dulled your senses for so long, but you have so many that support you and know your pain. You're not alone in this. Thank you for being strong enough to share this.